So last week I was walking home from meeting a friend of mine for some afternoon drinks in Soho, was a little tipsy, it was 10pm in the evening and the sky was dusky so still a little light for that time of day.
We walked as a group until Tottenham Court Road tube station and thats were we departed, I went down New Bond Street to get to Oxford Circus to get a bus back home. As I was walking, I didn’t have my earphones in for the first time in forever because my phone was almost dead so I like to have it for emergencies so I decided to go without the music. It was hell as I can’t go anywhere alone without music. So I was walking alone, and I saw a big rawdy group of guys, clearly more drunk than I was and I did feel a little worried but I go by the Philosophy if you just keep yourself to yourself 99.9% of the time its ok. So I kept walking and walked past them, apart from a few passing looks I didn’t get anything bad from them which was such a relief.
However I then hear from behind me yelling, one of the men shouting, ‘There he is, the devil walks amungst us’. At first I thought nothing of it just some drunken mumbo jumbo. However he continued after that to say, ‘no normal man walks like that, telling you thats the devil right there, fag’. This stunned me.
On the outside nothing happened, I didn’t turn back or run or stop to try and confront him. I didn’t cry or get upset over it, why would I? The scenario just shocked me.
Im rather lucky in the fact that I haven’t really faced that much hate. Apart from some disapproving family members everyone I have met has been so supportive and not phased at the simple fact I am gay. However it was the last statement that the man shouted that I will remember for a long time. It may have not been aimed at me who knows I didn’t care to check, however I was the only person on the road appart from them. Also strange timing right after I walk past them.
Fag. I hate that word so much.
Its the only word that will trigger me. Im pretty hard with most things, you could said what you wanted to me and really it wouldn’t impact me, and I have had some hurtful things said about – and too me by people I considered close. However that word, that gets me. Im not sure why that particular word, but it does.
This incident really assured me why we need pride today and how far we still have to travel to win the fight.
I was planning a why we need pride post in the future and begun writing it last week, however I erased it and started again on this one as this sums up why we need it far better than any words I can throw together. We have come so far in recent years. My generation is probably the most accepting and fluid generation ever and really, theres never been a better time to be gay!
However we still share The World with others who don’t think the same, people who still find homosexuality sinful, disgusting and curable. We still share the planet with people who find being anyway attracted to the same sex is nasty and not naturual. Its these very people that pride needs and pride should leverage to change their thinking and push the message that love it love and we can be and do and love whatever and whoever we want.
The World is so flexiable now, however even flexability has limits and its pride that pursues to push and break those limits.